Frustrating

I want someone I can't have. Not because he doesn't want me back, or because I am with someone else (I am but that's not the point), its strictly because of distance. He lives in California which presents a challenge in completing the intense physical need that we both have for each other. No one has ever gotten me as hot and bothered as he does, and it drives me absolutely crazy that I can't have him. I have never had this issue before. If I want something or someone I get it, one way or another. But no matter what I do my plans to have him are always spoiled. Either he can't get time off work to come here like he planned, or when he is here my guy won’t leave me alone long enough. Just thinking about him completely distracts me from everything else I should be doing. My sexual frustration with this man is reaching levels hither to unknown by me. I wonder if I will want him this badly once I have had him. Granted I am going to need a full week to live out all of the fantasies and desires I have for him, but once that is over will I still feel that pull when he calls or texts me? Anyone else ever had this situation with someone? The want for them is all consuming, but does that want last after you have had them?
I am texting him now and I can barely keep my mind on work. Good thing I keep toys in the car for just such an emergency!

Confessions

I have a confession to make. Not because I feel guilty, or because I think talking about it will wipe it away...no its because I just like talking about it lol. I have the best lover (at least for me) of all time. And he doesn't belong to me. I have known B for 8 years, and we have been lovers for almost 6 years. When we started messing around he was single (dating but no one exclusive) and I was in a very serious relationship...engaged serious. I was 19 at the time and he was 32. Every time he looked at me I could tell he was undressing me and I have never been so turned on my just eye contact. We had great phone sex, but we would also spend 2 or 3 hours on the phone just talking. I was a shoulder to cry on through several of his break-ups and he was there for me when I called off my engagement. I was his "best man" when he finally decided to take the plung and get married. He now has a beautiful daughter, and is still married, and I still love to screw his brains out. The thing I like most is that nothing is off limits with him. Everything goes, even the exhibistionist stuff like sucking his cock in a packed movie theater. Part of me thinks that I should feel bad that I am fooling around with a married man. The other part of me shrugs at the idea and says that we are too good together and technically he was mine first. He just recently moved to another state which was a little traumatizing for both of us, but the leaving sex was amazing, and the phone sex is still the best. He will be making a trip back up here soon and I can't wait for the phone call to let me know he is in town. Just thinking about it gets me all hot and bothered.
Most people will probably think worse of me because of this, but I really couldn't care less, its my life and I will continue to do what makes me happy!